The Day I Remembered the Love is  Within Me…

A couple of years ago, I was working in Morocco, giving sessions at a yoga retreat, when something truly special happened.

It was my first time trying Kundalini Yoga… and I just fell in love with it. There was something so natural about the practice, something ancient that felt familiar. I started doing it every single day, in between the classes I was teaching. It was like I had discovered a secret doorway inside me—one that led to a place I didn’t even know existed. A place of stillness, of clarity, of truth.

One day, after a strong session, I sat in silence, like I often did. But that time… something happened.

My mind went completely still, and suddenly, I heard this voice inside. Not my thoughts, not my emotions. Something deeper. My intuition. My soul. My higher self, maybe. And it said:

“All the qualities you love in others, you love them because they are already inside you. That’s why you recognize them. So why don’t you love yourself the same way? Why don’t you see your own beauty?”

That message was so clear, so gentle, and so true. I smiled… And suddenly—from somewhere very deep inside—I felt love. A wave of self-love, soft and full, came over me. I didn’t try to feel it… it just came. Like it had always been there, quietly waiting for me to remember it…

After that moment, I went to give a yoga session.
And something magical happened: when the class ended, nobody moved.
They all stayed there, lying down, quiet, still.
I knew they were feeling what I was feeling.
It was like love had filled the entire room… and somehow, without speaking, we were all sharing it.
If love had a color or a shape, I think it would have been everywhere in that space.It was so beautiful…

That state of unconditional love stayed with me for a while.
I don’t remember exactly how long—maybe days, maybe weeks…
But one thing stayed very clear in my heart:
That love wasn’t new. It wasn’t something I had just created.
It was something ancient, something I had known before—something my soul remembered.

And the strangest thing was… it felt just like the love I once had for someone who, for many years, I believed was the “love of my life”…

I met the “love of my life” in my early 20s, in my country. A friend of mine used to tell me about this man, saying we were meant to meet, that we were so alike in spirit. But I wasn’t interested in being set up, so I let it go. Two years later, life brought us together by surprise. The moment I saw him, something clicked. It was subtle, not dramatic—something inside me was activated… When we said goodbye that night, he hugged me and said, “She can’t leave. She stays with me.” And in that moment, I felt something I’d never felt before. Home. Complete safety. A deep soul memory, like I had always known him.

After that, we fell in love. Deeply. Not blindly—I saw all his flaws. He had many, and they weren’t easy ones. But none of them ever made me want to leavehim. Because his light… his joy when others were happy, his love for simplicity, the way his presence made even grey days feel like sunshine… it was magic. Just being around him made life more colorful. And though he was insecure and often pushed me away, I stayed. Because I trusted what I felt. Not the story. Not the circumstances. But my heart.

Everyone around me told me to let him go. That I deserved more. But I stayed until he pushed  away forever. And even then, I never stopped loving him. Because I never abandoned myself. Not once. I listened to my heart every step of the way. I was honest with myself. I knew I could trust him—not because he was perfect, but because I never felt a single doubt in my soul about his truth. My love for him wasn’t a fantasy. It was real. Pure. Soulful. And it never faded, because I stayed true to myself.

Years later, in Morocco, when that love for myself awakened in silence after yoga, it felt… familiar. Like the same love I had felt with him. But this time, it wasn’t coming from another person. It was coming from within me.

That’s when I understood something profound:

I thought he awakened love in me.
But really, he was a mirror.
And I already had that love inside me all along.

Around that same time, still in Morocco, I met someone else. Another yoga teacher. We had a lot in common, and he seemed truly interested in what I had to say. He would take notes during our conversations, telling me he was learning from me. It felt flattering at first… but also, if I’m honest, a little unsettling. Like he was seeing only a part of me, not the whole.

We ended up dating, and at times, our connection felt spiritual, deep, intense. But from the very beginning, a small voice inside me whispered, “Something isn’t fully true.” And still, I opened the door.

We shared beautiful moments, and I won’t deny the magic of some of them. But eventually, he told me he was still in love with someone else. I ended it. I tried to stay friends, but each time we spoke, I noticed how drained I felt energeticcaly… Slowly, I realized: I had to walk away. Not because I stopped caring—but because I needed to choose myself again.

And this is where something clicked inside me once more.

When I met him, I was still living in that awakened love I found within myself. I believe that’s why our paths crossed. But as I stopped listening to my own truth—as I ignored the soft warnings of my heart—that love within me began to dim. Not because of him. But because I abandoned my own knowing.

So now, when I look at both of these stories, I see something clearly:

In the first love, I stayed true to myself. I loved without losing myself.
In the second, I silenced my intuition, and that’s when I started to lose touch with the love inside me.

It wasn’t about the men. It was about me.

The moment I stopped trusting my intuition, the moment I stopped choosing my own truth, I dimmed the light of the love that had always lived inside me.
And every time I chose myself again—fully, honestly, bravely—I returned to it.

The love I felt in Morocco, the love I once thought someone else gave me… it was always mine.
It was never lost. It was just waiting for me to remember.

It’s not something I need to find.
It’s something I’m here to remember.
Over and over again.

And now, when love arrives, I won’t be searching.
I’ll be ready. Because it’s already here.

And if you are reading this, maybe it’s your time too—to remember the love that was always yours, is within yourself.